Stupid GI Tricks

[Rapparee]

You got three mags of nine rounds each! Luxury!
I was on one exercise where we had an average of 11 rounds total per man which were to last 5 days!

I guess we just don't know how to make our bullets count like you guys!

The same exercise some brain back in the kitchens had forgotten to place the meat order. 400 hungry young men had just 10 lbs to last them all a week!
As a "sorry" one morning they send out hot porridge which would have been great it being the middle of winter. Problem was it was absolutely riddled with weevils! I suppose they had to give us our protein somehow...

Reminds me of the story my dad told me about his reserve service in the 70s. His company had come back down from Devils Bit mountain after general field exercises, lugging the Lee-Enfield .303's and Brens through the muck (the good aul days so I'm reminded!). Apparently the cooks and higher-ups didn't anticipate that one company eating the battalions entire food allocation in a feeding frenzy. Accordingly the company and battalion sergeant called a general assembly and all they could say was "Lads, ah cmon now, ye were that feckin' hungry!"

[dragoon500ly]

One winter REFORGER, they were doing the field trails on the new T-Ration. We were coming right off of seven days straight of C-Ration and were looking forward to the admin-halt and a chance for hot food...

This was the menu:

A extra thin slice of meatloaf, still half frozen...an extra large scoop of green beans, fresh out of the can, and no it wasn't even warmed up....and for the T-ration....cherry julibee, lots and lots and lots of cherry julibee (did I mention that they had lots of cherry julibee). To this day (15 years later) I still can't stand cherry julibee!!!

[dragoon500ly]

I was going through some of my granddad's papers this weekend and came across this, don't know if its true or not...but knowing some of the kooks that are in the service, I don't doubt this for a minute!!!!

It seems that in World War II, our heavy bomber crews were suffering from severe stomach distress from the diet heavy in starchs and beans, being at 30,000 feet tends to allow the gas to flow freely and due to the discomfort caused by this, as well as the problems with taking a dump when you have to remove most of your clothing and squat over a cardboard box at -20F caused a lot of flyers to skip the evening meal.

Except for one intrepid navigator. Our hero freely loaded up on beans, greens, and potatoes every night and took a large stock of cardboard boxes with him on every bomb run. During the run into the target, he would take every chance to fill as many boxes as possible. He would then stock pile his "packages" next to to the bomb bay. When the doors were opened and the ordnance was dropped he would then add his "flingershasse" to the drop.

There is no record of anybody being hit by these makeshift missiles...but if it had happened......talk about getting your shit blown away!!!!

[dragoon500ly]

You know, fighter pilots are a strange breed. And World War II pilots certainly were the strangest of the breed. Not only did we have P-38 pilots looping the Golden Gate Bridge back in the states, but we had P-47 pilots flying so low in their strafing runs that there are several recorded instances of them striking tree tops, flying back to Britain with lengths of telephone wire dangling from their ac....and one instance of a P-47 flying back to jolly ole England, with the propeller of the Fw 190 that he had shot down stuck in the side of his fuselage.

Guess that one was a confirmed kill

[Abbott Shaull]

Guess that one was a confirmed kill

Overachiever.

[dragoon500ly]

Overachiever.

Picture the face of the intelligence officer at the debriefing...

"Can you confirm your claim"

CLUNK

"I don't think he got too far without his prop!"

[pmulcahy11b]

I saw one on Dogfights on History International where a P-47's wing sliced into a house during a dogfight. He not only flew home, he went on to take the German he was chasing down.

[dragoon500ly]

There is also the story of a P-47 pilot doing his bit to destroy the German telephone system....there is a photo that shows part of the telephone pole still embedded in the leading edge of his wing.

[Abbott Shaull]

Picture the face of the intelligence officer at the debriefing...

"Can you confirm your claim"

CLUNK

"I don't think he got too far without his prop!"

Kinda reminds me of the movie "Top Gun" when they were ask how they knew a Mig- could do that, and they reply to something of to the effect they gave the pilot of said MIG the bird...lol

[Abbott Shaull]

There is also the story of a P-47 pilot doing his bit to destroy the German telephone system....there is a photo that shows part of the telephone pole still embedded in the leading edge of his wing.

Not many aircraft of today age could do that.

[dragoon500ly]

Not many aircraft of today age could do that.

The only one that could even come close to the old P-47 is perhaps the A-10. Altough what the Air Force would do to a Warthawg pilot that hit a telephone pole......

It's kind of amazing just how much damage that the P-47 could take and still return to base...there are photos of flak damage that would have sent a F-16 into the ground and yet the Jug kept flying. Entire cylinders shot off off the engine and it still kept grinding. It may have not been the fastest, longest-ranged or best looking fighter of WWII....but I think that if I wasa pilot back then, then this is the fighter that I would want to be in.

[pmulcahy11b]

There was an O-1 Bird Dog in Vietnam that got back to base minus 4 feet of wing courtesy of a ZU-23.

[Abbott Shaull]

During my 2nd enlistment, I was assigned as an instructor to the Armor School at Fort Knox, Kentucky. Teaching the young'ns all about the M-60A1 tank, this happened (thank gawd!) to another company on the tank range.

Some background for those who have never served on a tank.

The M-60A1 uses a ballistic computer, unlike the modern computer on the M-1, the M60's used a series of geared wheels and cams to input the correct adjustment to the gun tube. To operate, you grasped a t-handle and pushed/pulled to index the correct round. The primary reason for the elevation adjustment is that antitank rounds such as the APDS round are high speed, flat-trajectory rounds, whereas rounds such as HEAT or HEP are low speed, high-trajectory rounds. Herein lies our tale...

One young student gunner had finished his assigned rounds and while exiting the gunner's seat, snagged the handle of the computer and pulled the setting from APDS to HEP.

The new gunner, in his excitment, thought that he had checked the computer and had APDS indexed. The loader placed a APDS training round in the tube and the gunner prepared to fire at the 2,000 meter target. The instructor tank commander failed to notice that the gun tube was at a "unusually high" angle and ordered the gunner to "FIRE!"

On a nearby range, I was coaching trainees on the use of the M-85 machinegun and happened to observe the tracer of a main caliber round flying well over the berm and disappearing well down range.

Needless to say, Range Control had a MAJOR hissy fit and shut down all of the ranges while they investigated.

The training sabot impacted 13 miles downrange, striking a Range Control storage shed, penetrating the roof, several stacks of targets, the concrete slab, and burying itself 7 feet into the ground.

The trainee gunner received a major "arse-chewing". The instructor tank commander received an Article 15 from the Training Brigade Commander and went from Staff Sergeant, E-6 to Private, E-1 in about 2.5 seconds.

Ouch. So was this E-6 a Drill Sergeant or just technical instructor Either way what a way to lose rank and pay drop...

[Abbott Shaull]

Tony,

There is an intresting story out of one of the Red Flag exercises held in Nevada. It seems that the RAF sent some Buccaneers over as Red Force bombers. The USAF, with its brand new F-15Cs was looking forward to nailing the RAF...so much so that a case of Dewar's Scotch was bet on the outcome.

The result...

RAF made 12 attacks on targets and never lost a single plane. They did it by doing nap of the earth, at less than 100 feet altitude and at high speed. It turns out the much-vaunted Eagles couldn't see on radar at such low altitude, and that the older Buccaneers, were faster and more maneuverable than the Eagles at low level.

Game, set and match to the Royal Air Force!!!!!

It what happens when you believe your own hype and not take into account the reality of what the vehicle/aircraft can actual do.

[Abbott Shaull]

The only one that could even come close to the old P-47 is perhaps the A-10. Altough what the Air Force would do to a Warthawg pilot that hit a telephone pole......

It's kind of amazing just how much damage that the P-47 could take and still return to base...there are photos of flak damage that would have sent a F-16 into the ground and yet the Jug kept flying. Entire cylinders shot off off the engine and it still kept grinding. It may have not been the fastest, longest-ranged or best looking fighter of WWII....but I think that if I wasa pilot back then, then this is the fighter that I would want to be in.

Yeah but the A-10 is built like those old aircraft when you consider it armored bath tub with wings...